Thank you for kind smiles, and interest in me. Thank you for taking the time to stop, kneel down, look into my eyes and say hello to me. Thank you for placing your hand over mine so I can take part in the fun. Thank you for making sure I always feel welcome and safe. Thank you for accepting me for who I am….loud noises and all! Thank you for respecting my dignity. Thank you for your strength to hold me up so I can pick up toys and clean the floor, I don’t want to have to see my friends do all the work! Thank you for prayers and encouragement. Thank you for believing in my value as a member of my community. Thank you for pushing my chair and for recording messages on my big button. Thank you for carrying me up the stairs when the elevator’s broken. Thank you for learning to sign and for listening to my eyes. Thank you for the songs you sing. Thank you for the hugs, I’m not sure who enjoys them more…me or you;) Thank you for ramps and a parking stall. Thank you for waiting. Thank you for working so hard to make me a smile. Thank you for accessible playgrounds! Thank you for playing with me and learning with me and growing with me, because I love it all!!
Love,
Carson
I believe that Carson’s eyes, smiles and affections each day demonstrate gratitude. He is a very blessed little boy and this shows in his subtle response to the world. He is never scolded and often praised. He receives soft looks of approval everywhere we go. He feels love radiate from strangers. I wish Blade and Meagan could experience the world through Carson’s eyes….I wish all kids could.
Unfortunately, where I see the greatest lack of inclusion is with children who live with invisible issues. Many children in our community live with disorders such as Autism and ADHD and many are living in extremely stressed out environments as families navigate transitions, like death, debt, and divorce. These kids deserve compassion and understanding the same way Carson does. The last thing they need is another scolding, they endure far too much criticism and not nearly enough praise. Many adults do not have the patients to even be kind to them. To add to that, their parents will carry the burden of the opinions and advice from countless people, most of which assume that the only reason for undesirable behavior is inadequate parenting. This has a huge impact on the self-esteem of the parent; the most influential model in a child’s life…..feels like a sac of crap.
Some things I’ve learned from Blade include: Behavior is communication, he needs to know that you hear what he is trying to say. He needs 4:1 compliments vs. criticism. When I tell him he is a good boy, he is acts like a good boy. When I am cranky, so is he. He is very sensitive to his environment, if you are only tolerating him, he senses that, loses confidence in himself, and acts out….he needs to feel accepted rather than tolerated. Don’t we all?
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