We have a beautiful, interdependent relationship; although I lost my Grandma Cowan when I was 14, she, my Grandma Stevenson, and my Mom play critical roles in shaping who I am today....I think of them everyday, not just on Mother’s Day. Now that I too am a mother, I am constantly gaining new understanding and respect for them all.
Grandma Cowan comes to my mind frequently in my day to day tasks. I spent a lot of time with her, learning her role; she baked with me, she made Grandpa lunch with me, she let me do dishes and fold the laundry, long before I could do it well. She let me stay overnight all the time and she always let me pick a nightie out of her drawer. She cuddled me and told me about my family and my history, and she danced the Highland fling to make me laugh!
She taught me this song:
Old Lady Dire, she shit by the fire.
The fire was too hot, so shit in the pot,
The pot was to round, so she shit on the ground.
The ground was too flat, so she shit on the cat.
And the cat ran away with shit on his back!
When I started going through the teen years, and I was horrible and mean and hateful to everyone around me, she seemed to be ok with who I was, no matter what. Mom couldn’t be that person, she needed to piss me off, set me straight and help me to learn right from wrong (she had her work cut out for her;). My Grandma was my favorite person to be with back then. I would often choose her over my friends; we’d watch soaps, drink tea, and smoke. She treated me much older than I was, and listened to me in a way that made me feel important. The only time in my life I remember her being angry with me, is when I went to a friend’s house and didn’t tell her. She yelled at me and then we cried. She felt bad for yelling, I felt bad for making her worry so much.
I am sure some people would think poorly of the relationship we had, (I'm sure there were times my Mom was not happy with her MIL) I am so glad that she balanced her concerns with respect for the love we had for each other. I am like my Grandma Cowan in a lot of ways and I am proud of the traits I carried on. I have never hurt so badly, as I did the day I lost her.
My Grandma Stevenson....anyone who knows me, knows of the undying love I have for her! As far back as my memory can reach, I have lively, fun memories of my Grandma. I can still feel the excitement build in my belly when I recall waiting for her to come kiss my brother and me good night. She would come down the hall snorting and growling, to signal the Tickle Monster was on her way! She was merciless, chasing us and capturing us to chew on our necks and kissing us a thousand times (way to wind us down for sleep G’ma;)
She lives a life that is steeped in tradition and community; I have always admired that about her. I feel a sense of pride telling people I descend from her because she is so fun-loving, generous with her time, friendship, and laughter, that when ever I mention her name, I make a new friend.
Grandma Stevenson makes me feel special each and every time I talk to her. I know in my life, there have been times when I’ve disappointed her and worried her, but I also know that she has never stopped loving me and cheering for me. She wears her emotions on her sleeve, and seeing her pride in me, is something I’ve grown to need. Watching her love my Grandpa makes my heart swell:) She is an understanding ear, always there for me to call. I plan to carry on her traditions and her zest for life, always making her proud!
My Mama is my strength. I have never been meaner to anyone in the world than her, yet, she has NEVER wavered in her love for me. My mom quit drinking when I was 9 yrs old, she has never had another drink since then, (and I am very proud of that fact). She has shown me the human capacity to change and grow. She has taught me important lessons in coping, recovery, and survival by living the words she speaks. She helped me to understand the value of trust and forgiveness. She has given me the gift of true, unconditional love. She doesn’t always agree with me, and she doesn’t pretend she does, but she always supports me regardless.
Now that I’m a mom, my mama’s role has expanded; she extends the same love and support to my babies. My cousin once said, “Watching my mom love my child is like getting a hug from her myself” I think of that often, because it is so true! If you know my Mom, you know the pride she has for all three of her Grandbabies....she supports their dreams, and cheers them on across the miles, she and Dad have built their home around us too! The sacrifices she has made for me.....MAN! THANKS MOM!
Happy Mothers Day to you three precious ladies, I will always love you! I hope to pass the best of each of you onto each of my three, then world will be a better place:)
