Sometimes It Is Hard to Stay Cool

I wear these two hats, Mom and Advocate.  I feel an intense passion for both.  Sometimes, I find it very difficult to notice when I change my own hat!  One minute, I can be sitting at the train station, singing/signing a song to my son while we wait for a train, and the next thing I know, I am embroiled in a conversation about inclusion! 

These frequent conversations happen rather naturally, usually when someone asks me questions about my children such as, “So, do you know exactly what to expect for Carson when he’s older?”, and when comments are made to me (or within my earshot) about “those behavior kids”.  I think it is best to not make any assumptions about Carson’s future or about “those behavior kids”, because those assumptions can lead to resentment, low expectations and segregation (just to name a few)

I recently signed up for a webinar series, the Fundamentals of Inclusive Education through the University of New Hampshire, as part of a research study (thanks for pointing this out Kristin;). So far I have done one pre-test, read 20 pages, and watched a 90 minute webinar (12 or 13 more to go) and I already have already acquired some more powerful language to help me to articulate my rational for advocating for inclusion for my children.... for all children.

 "The least dangerous assumption" ....There it is!  I wish my keypad had music notes;)

I want everyone to assume that Carson can understand them, even if it doesn’t appear that way.  What’s the harm in assuming he understands, even if he lacks the ability to communication and control over his body enough to prove it, at this time?  Assuming he understands will help to protect him from inappropriate conversations and neglect that can occur when people dangerously assume he can not understand them (for example).  

Could assuming that he would love to play Follow the Leader with a bunch of other 5 and 6 yr olds, be harmful?

I will embed this perspective in my brain and make decisions as a mother and an advocate that reflects this, because I believe it is the least harmful approach.  It is so easy to get confused, there is so much advice, and such a variety of perspectives.  Some people are truly inspired to help us along on our journey, others are on there own agenda (to which they are entitled).  My job is to decipher who to trust.

I am a trusting individual but, not just of others, I’ve learned to trust myself.  One very important thing that advocating has taught me, is that a university degree does not equal a higher understanding of my child than I have.  Through Carson and Blade’s Doctors, Nurses, Teachers, and Therapists, and their confidence in me, I’ve learned that educated people are capable of making honest mistakes, just like I am.  When Carson was 3 years old I dug deeper than I ever thought possible to forgive a life threatening mistake in the hospital.  While the mistake was happening, there was a voice inside me that knew something was wrong, but I allowed a first year residents’ education, intimidate me into silence... the result, a swarm of doctors running with my baby on a bed to the PICU.  I forgave her, she learned, I learned, that’s life.  SCARY!  Ever since then, I trust my inside voice, and let it out.... just in case I’m right.  What is the harm in that?  I’m wrong I may feel embarrassed, but maybe I’m right....

I don't mind looking foolish or over-protective as much anymore.

Just as I hope that people act as if Carson can understand, I hope that people understand, that Blade does not “try to be disruptive”.  There is danger in assuming any person's motives for any one behavior; if a person believes that Blade enjoys behaving in an out-of-control manner, or that he decided to do something mean,  it would be difficult to stop from feeling resentment towards him and judgement toward his family.  Even unspoken resentment can seriously damage a relationship and impair self-esteem.  The best way to avoid the resentment, is to have a less harmful assumption of his motives in the first place.  Instead, assume (if you must) that he is having a difficult time coping with life.  Assume (if you must) that he is hurting inside.  Assume (if you must) that he is hungry!  Those types of assumptions will provoke compassion and responsiveness, which is exactly what he needs. 

This enlightenment has caused me to review my son’s coding assessments carefully, and to seriously consider the difference between diagnosis and assumption.  I owe it to my children to edit out, all of the harmful assumptions in their lives which have the potential to limit them.

                       Never let anyone make you doubt your dreams!

My Voice Will Be Heard Because I am Involved

In my last post I wrote about attending the district’s stakeholder’s consultation regarding the new draft Vision, Mission, Beliefs and Values and Priorities for the next three years.  There were two ways offered to provide input, through an online questionnaire or at an in-person consultation with Trustees and other stakeholders.  In total, 285 individuals provided input (A small group, considering the district serves more than 80,000 students and their families and employs approximately 7,000+ staff to support them).   

Below is the Draft we were asked to consult on.

Draft Vision, Mission, Beliefs and 2011-2014 District Priorities

Presented at Public Board January 25, 2011

Our Vision

That every student completes high school* and demonstrates the competencies** and

character necessary to be ethical citizens, engaged thinkers and contributing members of an

inclusive and democratic society.

Our Mission

To provide learning environments and leadership necessary to support all students to achieve

success in a complex and changing world.

Our Beliefs and Values

• Public education underpins a successful future.

• Being responsive to the educational needs of the broader community is the foundation of

our District’s approach to education.

• All students can succeed in their education.

• Diverse opportunities give students different paths to achieve academic and social

success.

• Access to educational opportunities should be fair and reasonable.

• Students, parents, staff, the Board of Trustees, and community members share

responsibility and accountability for results.

􀁹 Our learning environments should be:

o safe

o healthy and health-promoting

o welcoming and respectful

o learner-centered

o responsive and flexible

o creative and innovative

o environmentally sustainable

Our District’s Priorities (2011-2014)

1. Emphasize literacy, numeracy, critical thinking and innovation for all of our learners.

2. Instill in each student the attributes of healthy living and ethical citizenship.

3. Enable inclusive*** learning environments where every student feels welcome and safe.

4. Provide a collaborative, healthy and innovative workplace that recognizes individual

contributions and supports opportunities for growth and professional development.

On Tuesday, March 8^th at 6:00pm there will be a public school board meeting, the Proposed Vision, Mission, and 2011-2014 District Priority recommendations will be presented and voted on.  The changes made most certainly reflect to me, that the voices of the parents, students and the community were heard.

Vision, Mission, and 2011-2014 District Priorities

Vision

All students will learn to their full potential and develop the ability, passion, and imagination

to pursue their dreams and contribute to their community.

Mission

We work with families and community partners to provide safe, healthy, diverse, and

equitable learning experiences that engage students to achieve their full potential in an

increasingly interdependent world.

District Priorities 2011-2014

1. Provide supports and programs that enable all students to complete high school.

2. Deepen students’ understanding of equity and empathy as key citizenship traits.

3. Ensure all students and their families are welcomed, respected, accepted, and

supported in every school.

4. Promote health and wellness for all students and staff.

5. Listen to staff, honour their contributions, and support their opportunities for growth

and professional development.

I will be attending the public board meeting on Tuesday night.  Whether I do it from my cozy house via webcast or in person is still yet to be decided, since there is an option, Ronan’s work schedule will be the determining factor.

In addition to having my voice heard at that consultation, I was afforded the opportunity to make a connection with one of our Trustees, Christopher Spencer.  After listening in on our table’s discussions, he passed me his email address.  I wasted no time; I emailed him within a couple of days.  I told him about my passion for inclusion and about the learning opportunities afforded to me by the GRIT program.  I expressed an interest in becoming involved, at a district level, with all things inclusion (I was much more long winded than that, but that sums it up;), a few days following that, I received an email back, Trustee Spencer had forwarded my email onto two other Trustees and the Managing Director of Consulting Services, John Edey.  Hmmmm…what could come of this?

On Valentine’s Day, I received an email that would have my feet leave the floor for the rest of the week!  It was from John Edey, it explained that the Board of Trustees at Edmonton Public Schools has formed a Special Needs Task Force consisting of three Trustees.  The Terms of Reference called for an Advisory Committee of district staff and parent/community partners.  The responsibilities of the advisory committee will be to advise the trustees on the Task Force regarding:

 ·       the process for gathering input

·       the interpretation of the information gathered

·       implications and feedback regarding possible recommendations

On behalf of Trustee Cheryl Johner (Task Force chair), Trustee Leslie Cleary, and Trustee Christopher Spencer, Mr. Edey extended an invitation for me to join the Advisory Committee!  I was honored to be asked and I wasted no time accepting the offer.

This is where I must acknowledge my incredibly supportive husband, each of the 3 meeting that have been scheduled are 2-2.5hrs long, during the weekday.  This means that I will need to rely on Ronan to work from home and take care of getting the boys to school and collecting Carson afterward.  He is so proud of me and it shows in the way he never bitches about the lousy pay I receive for my commitments, in fact, he views my experiences as free education and encourages and accommodates me all the time.  (In case anyone wondering where he fits into all of this…all of this, would not happen if not for his support;)



What he lacks in sophistication, he makes up for with his dependable sense of humor;)

I attended the first Advisory Committee meeting on February 22^nd.  This is a truly empowering experience, it is an opportunity for me to collaborate and build relationships amongst a group of aprx. 40 people who are considered to be incredibly knowledgeable in the in area of inclusive education.

All of my friends, especially those of you who teach, or who have children in an Edmonton Public School, I urge you to have your voice heard, inclusion is for ALL students.

Special Needs Task Force Consultation

The Board of Trustees invites interested parents and community partners to come together to discuss how we can help students thrive in an inclusive education system. Trustees are looking forward to hearing different perspectives and using that feedback to ensure every student can reach their full potential.

The dates for parent focus groups are:

• Thursday, March 10, 7 to 9 p.m. (Quote #LEAD018-01)
• Wednesday, March 16, 7 to 9 p.m. (Quote #LEAD018-02)

Please join us and be part of this important work. To register, call 780-429-8050 or email consultingservices@epsb.ca.

Both sessions will be held at the Centre for Education, One Kingsway, Edmonton. Underground parking is available.

John Edey, Managing Director
Consulting Services
780-429-8598

Our voices are being heard, we can affect a change, don’t let anyone make you think it’s not worth a try;)